Do you ever ask yourself why can’t I just be happy? Becoming happy isn’t some complex formula. There are simple things that you can do today that can really help to change your state of mind for the better.
How to be happy – 5 Easy Steps: Video:
1.) Change your physiology
This is the biggest step because often when we are un-happy we don’t even realise that our bodies are hunched over and withdrawn. Our faces and body language paint a story of sadness. If we simply consciously make our bodies do the opposite of how we feel we can feel instantly better.
If you are committed to choosing to be happy then you have to do something. Get up, laugh, smile and jump around because it is the first trick you can play on your brain that will make it feel happy. Once this physiological barrier to happiness drops everything else on the path to happiness is so much easier.
As one of my biggest inspirations; Tony Robbins says “The mind will follow whatever state your physical body is in and not vice-versa”.
2.) See things as they are, not worse than they are
A lot of people see their problems so much bigger than they truly are. Let’s be honest, no problem is 100% un-solvable. Every problem has a solution in some way or other. You just need to find it. While on your journey to finding the solution you need to be able to put it all into perspective.
Are things really that bad? What great things around you do you still have? Putting everything into perspective has some great affects:
– You appreciate the other things in your in life that perhaps you have taken for granted
– You find a solution or a way of moving forward so much faster
– You refocus on what is important to you in life
Once you find gratitude for what you do have, happiness often follows.
There are huge benefits in meditating and I would honestly say that for me this is the biggest thing that turned my depression around. Why? Because it helps you to stop and connect with your unconscious mind (the part of your brain that you can’t usually hear, the one that tells you to breath and that tells your heart to beat).
Tapping into your unconscious mind allows you to calm your breathing and lower your blood pressure. One thing that I found was amazing was that I was able to really connect with my past anxiety and get to the route of where it was coming from.
Meditation took me a little time to connect with. I would sometimes sit for 2 minutes and have an over whelming urge to move my arms and legs. I literally could not lay still because of feeling a tad stilly, I was not used to it. In the same way that when I started to learn to drive I just wanted to get right of the car because I couldn’t do it.
Like with anything it takes time, it takes practice to master but when you understand the huge benefits meditating can have it just makes sense. If you wanted to know more about the benefits of meditation there is a fantastic article over at Life Hacker – What Happens to the Brain When You Meditate (And How it Benefits You).
When feeling down or depressed it’s often because there is a huge part of you focusing on how you are feeling and what you are not getting in life.
I find that a lot people say ‘but I dooooo contribute, I give so much of myself and no-one ever does anything for me or no-one ever appreciates what I do’.
If this is how you are looking at the idea of contributing then you are never going to get happy. Contributing is not about what you can get back from another person, or racking up points that you can cash in later.
Contribution is exactly that, contributing. What you get from it is to be able to think solely about another person and how good that makes you feel. To learn more about contribution visit the 6 human needs by Tony Robbins, where there is tons of free learning.
5.) Surround Yourself with People
Surrounding yourself with people is very important as I hope you’ll find out in the 6 human needs, one of our needs in for Love and Connection. When we focus on others and not on ourselves we can really feel alive. Now, I understand that some people might not be around others very often because of geographic location, or the jobs that we have. However there are loads of ways to connect with people by joining clubs and classes that get you out there and break old habits.
I recently discovered an app call Meet Up. This a great simple app that allows people with similar interests to arrange small gatherings to “Meet Up”. These Meet Ups, may involve a free talk on a specific subject, trips aways or simply a small gathering at your local pub. There are so many things going on in your local area that you probably had no idea were happening around the corner. You name an interest and I’m sure you will find a group not too far from you!
Doing a Meet Up like the above, or simply seeing some friends or family helps you to snap out of a bad mood and to appreciate the power of love and connection with other people.
So how do I become happy?
Ultimately getting happy is a choice and it means you have to make positive changes to get there, getting happy doesn’t just magically happen. Remember in the words of Tony Robbins ‘Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice’.